6.4.13

spam haiku bait

Sullivan's Daily Dish highlights the New York Times' new haiku generator.

3.3.11

Spam filters failing, spam haiku to the rescue!

Suit as a mobster
Turn on as a transgressor,
just like Kiefer did!

pick up perception
damage Ted Young and birthright!!
decision yours. Yours.

9.2.10

'tis the season (warms the heart)

Mr. Successful?
Your true precious metals can
enjoy life again

Valentine's Special
U want it, U got it. Now
VIAGRA, on us!

Calling all lovers!
Time is ticking away get
your boat wet skipper

change the look of your
eHarmonyPartner, why
not try meds now? Now.

Why burn your money?
COBRA is too expensive.
Stay warmer with love.

6.3.09

it's like a big Tennessee Williams play in condensed form.

Rachel Ray learned how
to whiten her teeth: find out
her secret! Her shame.

18.1.09

weight loss spam for uncertain times

You deserve a boost
Oprah Winfrey endorsement,
Skinny skinny wow!

Try our formula!
Real genuine artifacts
Tailormade blowout

Better slim, fast, go!
Old friends could be searching now
Show your new figure

Never let others
call you toothpick again, no:
remove the calluses, now.

12.1.09

a public service announcement.

In a public service spirit, we present this for your consideration. There's even a haiku down the page the make this remotely relevant to spam haiku. Enjoy.

9.1.09

The Elements of Spam

Presented for your edification and enjoyment.

7.1.09

No, it is you who are welcome...

No exam/class, bub?
Erase all the memories
of your failure. Wow.

Thank you for interest
in many fabrication.
At this we excel.

4.1.09

such an original idea!

Hmm. CAPTCHA Poetry. Oblique! Not that the big bad old internet isn't big enough for all of us to just get along, but somehow I think our spam haiku comes out the winner in this matchup, no?

via Boing Boing

22.12.08

just in time for the holidays

Everybody:
Come. Change the time in your pants
to 12 pm sharp

When you think that your
instrument is broken, try
this pill. Christmastime!

17.10.08

wow. harsh. (stick of pleasure?)

No woman thinks your
babymaker of man is
hard enough!!! Click here.

Turn it to a stick
of pleasure. Improve of your
well-being today!!!

21.9.08

the spam flow is nothing if not responsive to the market, it appears.

Stop starving yourself
Take kids to Six Flags and pray
Clean from inside, out.

Avoid foreclosure.
Hollywood? ...interested.
Use your property.

It is Key indeed.

Why queue up you just
ask: Who and why should we take
Viagra? For? With?

ask for your reward
keep nitelife active, spicy
become Love Target

Looking for ways solve
male, financial, family
problems? FREE is key.

Re: more spam love

A founding member of the Collective writes in:


We are of two minds on this. First, an evolving one: a litigious mindset, grounded quickly by recognition that she's an artist and is too broke to sue, delivering us to acceptance and a cheerful wishing of her well. You go, Linzie from London!

Second mind, greed: Where's our AdSense check for spam haiku, Google? Huh? Why don't you ever call us, Google? Ain't you my baby daddy?

7.9.08

We're often full of the angles ourselves...

Recession proof jobs?
Lovemaking. Be the master.
World Series: Vega$.

Rise, with AcaiPure,
Power-pack your pecker, pal.
Give lady the best!

Don't miss out on our
Fake guide to sleep disorders.
Full of the angles.

30.8.08

red. purple. orange. yellow?

4 smoldering shades
This will help men pleasure you
Buddies are in awe

these nurses want you:
off the charts growing organ.
say goodbye, cable.

Claim Your Grant Money!
Looking to advance career?
Claim Your Grant Money!

SuperGreenTeaPatch
boosts your metabolism
Simply stick to foot

8.8.08

10 Creative Ways To Reuse Your Junk Mail

Here at spam haiku, of course, we've been doing this for ages.

9.3.08

amen!

you have to wonder
is Hillary Clinton a
good candidate now?

Free media, sure.
But are you people person?
That will decide it.

Bad money for debt
Don't recognize a number
Polls say many things

29.2.08

well all right then!

theodore, try our
Complementary Bible
Software. You Need It.

1.2.08

The Truth About Forwards

hugging my pillow.
sharp, professional, honest:
this, my one true love.

Tap into what's new.
The Miracle E.D. drugs.
Be most beautiful

But what about this?
of the Truth About Forwards?
Love just looks ahead.

Hermes watches but
ever falls behind. Cheaper
choices overseas.

Man Rock: Strong and fast
recover for multiple
repeat sessions. Yeah!

Look no further, just
Say NO to small-sized losers!
Space shuttle blastoff!

A kiss so gentle.
Even CEO's consult
us for the secret.

Great to be back, and
be the oracle again.
There's words in my heart.

20.1.08

feels like 6 degrees (Fahrenheit)

anthropologies
overdiscipline, huntsville.
coalbagger: greenage.

moralization?
sigilaroid. curtainwise...
dunger. sarcotic

garlic doffs, beholds
resemblingly, blithefully.
preimitative.

8.1.08

that's poetry, babe.

We groped in the club...
and when she knew my mahood?
Viagra forest.

bible stomach

Ronald J. Rhinestone
Inquiries answered, spanked, sent.
Efficient dazzle.

Important notice!
Notice impotent, notice.
Classy. Profession.

Bible stomach. Is
there any holier thing
than to have less you?

disturbing granny haiku

Golden Gate gambling
We collect all your winnings
Even before play!

The wonderful awe
our Babies of Oz inspire
is truly special.

Join the cash parade
Soon you will be slinging your
Skiing granny boobs!

2.1.08

news flash

SpaCapsule immune.
ABC responsible.
Takes market by storm.

in South Korea
TV said Choi would donate
his organs. and live!

ingested response
the potent naked drug laughs
as it is harmless.

28.12.07

agéd in the two-syllable sense, of course

when you are agéd
and never give up, even.
Viagra can help.

Show her larger you.
Help you and help your woman
X-ray meat succeeds

acid, uniform
cooking the rocks region-wide
against the British.

Sparkling and happy.
We'll load patterns into brain
for two thousand eight.

27.12.07

fading gambler fervor

avoiding the flu
the fun way: redneck tango.
Ants in your pants dance!

if you want/are a
real creator of your life
you must grow your sex.

Children are plopped in
a design paddle pattern.
Perhaps, she loves deep?

To prepare welcome:
Who knows this is replica?
One jump you're ahead.

This much is certain:
After gambler's fervor fades
The debt remains his.

20.12.07

limited time offer

please must reconfirm
all user data in our
security center.

promise your lady
too much for holidays but
cannot deliver?

limited offer
didn't quite work out that way
now it's out of time.

my god, it's NRA haiku.

humanity deer
carbon in your molecules
lead in your belly.

does our ass look fat in this haiku?

pound short at the top
but below yours will fill up
double feature screen

Lighten up

Only brief second:
George Soros knows the score now.
Stimulate the walls.

Go antifungal
Privately, all girls agree
a rotten one stinks.

Much as you might want,
Wealth can be a real dead weight.
Better spend all now.

Only true answer.
Buy pills immediately.
Good drugs fix all things.

the spams are getting downright fascist...

Democratic change
can only come by barrel
of the gun. Who shoots?

Met asperity
with personal relations?
Grip confidence back!

Super-size love stick
in trousers appreciate
the snug full new fit

Yugoslavia, make note.

After, it's only
fun and winning. Your Vegas:
quiet, personal.

Yugoslavia!
Hungarian police use
water cannon now.

When you win, we win!
Don't be left out of the fun.
Casino your home!

pants down Christmas

In 2008
all girls are yours for taking!
Bustle up, time flies!

Did you forget to
Take your meds theodore? Hmm?
Tons of free play time.

Winter is hitting
and Christmas are coming soon.
Don't get caught pants down.

At Glory Way Church
There is a seat waiting you
Jesus is patient.

8.12.07

A lean flat stomach.
Get your trial kit to health
with colon cleaning.

Happy Holidays
with Healthy Samples. Easy
work, great pay. Extend!

Become a real man
Just increase your Aggregate.
Charges in your car!

3.12.07

Are you Under Paid?
great pay, at home, replica.
from Thomas Kinkade.

Credit pay jackpot!
Holidays this year on us.
No charge is too large.

Fun-filled first listings
security, unite. vote!
more Medicinals

Fingers crossed, Rebate
in processing position.
why not buy online?

2.12.07

it does the trick indeed

Make dusting easy,
fast & fun! motorized you
will find cleans things best.

Help your little guy
Can you imagine that you
are really healthy?

Ladies confess, true,
when you are only half there:
no satisfaction.

crockery, pewter
and tin be its substitutes;
and as for chairs? ...well.

provoked man's regrets
soon enough, and he will find
way to retrace steps.

lighting some spunk with
well-armed battery, aside.
step aside. he comes.

Eager to polish
your style. cool luxury?
Don't waste no more time.

Get a good boner
back in your life. our research
shows this does the trick.

Problem-solving play
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satisfaction lays.

1.12.07

I started in May
at 5 inches length. I grew
6 inches 2 months

29.11.07

indeed!

Drugs for Theodore!
Buy now, because let's face it:
Skid marks ain't sexy.

Self, you need to hear.
What we have to offer you
cannot offer self.

But more size means more
sensitivity. Got it?
All ladies agree.

Want to pass on an
unforgettable night? Don't.
Pressure makes the man.

sky is the limit

register today,
Outstanding Receptionist.
what a career track!

knobnost

if you have trouble
keeping it hard how will you
survive? try knobnost.

23.11.07

nonchalantly microscope

In high demand now.
Become a nurse THEODORE!
Breastfeed with Style

Finally! You hold
(nonchalantly microscope)
medical options.

Why are you half there?
Acapulco amorous.
Frustrate, frustrating

we believe in local price.
competitive bids:
Here at Sunroom Tree.

17.11.07

Happy SlimTime, ya'll.

Learn Cheryl Tiegs' secret
58, the way she looks:
unbelievable.

Two bottles, no cost.
As Featured on Oprah &
ABC. SlimTime!

You have wakeup at
DebtSettlementUSA
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Opportunity
Re-Grow Your Hair Starting NOW!
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Menopause experts.
Gourmet Kafe delivered
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11.11.07

high load home school jobs

Luxury TownHome 
Costa Rica financing
your tropical dreams!

A good teacher makes
all the difference. Earn more
high load home school jobs!

Have Diabetes
and on Medicare? No fault
of your government.

How is your credit?
You could have your dream home if
you Look Years Younger.

Help keep your necklace
Bracelet, or Anklet secure
Clever clasp solves it

Ron Paul President
Get online approval and
your rent paid just vote

Sleep away the pounds
Get completely out of debt
alkaline cola.

Opportunities
The right car, right loan. Right now.
Google strikes back hard.

Schedule your LASIK 
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Watches with bling but

10.11.07

Blow out average:
our Super Dick Vitamins.
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all your fat fair share.

Let the government
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all your fat fair share

Single Latinos
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now legally you
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Love law enforcement.
Help protect our country or
eliminate future.

my bear shirt, her arm.

Are you smart enough
for College? Make sure you can
handle commitment.

Start your free test now
if you have what it takes to
make it in big school.

Better than Botox
injections, reduce wrinkle
experience youth

monstrous diversity
including backbreaking to
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No waiting pad with
redeem in totality.
Permit me to doubt.

on the coast, softly:
danger, Having collected
my bear shirt, her arm.

vespertilian
counting-house, in muscle, gave
paramount expense.

1.11.07

parched? portly?

HoodiaWater!
The newest breakthrough on the
weight loss market! Drink

Looking for Viag

Looking for Viag.
Look no further. Can't find
anxiety meds.

We got em. Need Phent
to lose the fat..no problem.
Huge range of products.

operators are standing by

Republicans are
smarter than Democrats or
are they? Vote and win.

25.10.07

those who can help navigate

the maze of products:
premiums, terms, conditions.
locate the right one.

As seen on TV:
Replica watches, bags, pens.
She'll beg you for more.

Medium outrage
We are NASA verified!
The sky's the limit.

Hope is no method.
Stop Using Low Carb Diets
Lose 9 lbs. a day

a daunting task. What
we've done is make the process
a lot easier.

We've identified
in your area those who
can help navigate

Cat Genie Cat Box

You will be surprised
at what you find out about
him. Start your search now.

Cat Genie Cat Box:
cat owners know. Who wants left
With a smelly mess?

Easy to setup
Eliminate the hassle
and maintains itself

to that judgment, this:
a poorness. But if a man
cannot obtain it?

One that cannot see,
regenerize your member.
The ablest men have.

Who else do you know,
back pain and sciatica?
Now it is your turn.

Livia sorted well with
the arts of her husband, yet
Looks for Valium.

24.10.07

Eliminate it, indeed.

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Did you know that the
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yo! Check this out dude

Alan H., Denver
swears by Advanced Gain Pro, dude.
Consumer Alert!

Male enchancement pill
I took the plunge and ordered
Yo! Check this out dude

Fake enhancement pills
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A recent study
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"I Couldn't believe the change..."
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So far very good
Put a smile on her face
Confidence in bed

16.10.07

We swinging a new bat.

Cruel cruel Gartenberg
wounded all developers:
Code so slow, so slow.

17,000
escorts all organized by
region and menu

move through the day with
some big dick confidence that
blisters opponents

What should we give mom?
Showing you care shouldn't have
to be so hard, bro.

Corpulent people
gather round, you roundish ones.
We swinging a new bat.

I love how your stuff
rapidly affect boyfriend!
Continually.

Parochial be damned.
Art that exists solely in
World of computer

Showing I love you
Shouldn't have to be so hard.
What is the answer.

Alleviation:
Pain, Jealousy, Contention.
Little bit of dust.

pharmacy of dreams

pharmacy of dreams
we always working for you
check your invoice wow!

you gotta have this!
this will make it MUCH harder
Go, Psycho Kitty!

Your superstar stock report:
China voice is on a roll
You heard it here first!

Wanda Beijing, oh.
This is not a fly by night
Platinum, baby.

We've hundreds of top
models to choose from, why go
shop anywhere else?

Just when you thought you
Exceedingly delighted
You see nothing yet.

Now for the empire
Easy, safe, affordable
stirring rumor pots.

When last time you have
Seriously passionate
Sex with a lover?

Whisper her money
Nothing illuminates a
woman's wrist like that

Friends will be jealous!
Finally your new life here!
Forget all before.

Bootie town hall was
packed for the sailor meeting
Shaking, reverie.

Contemplation much?
I'm a sailor ma'am
and I understand

12.10.07

so endowed with investment

hey little tugboat
Sydney ferry hits a ship
true bridge candidate

hello, heavyweight
master of size, muscle thighs,
Women will go mad!

yo this is not good
in Kabul it won't be safe
Flanders is Flemish

The draw saw all three
Let us assist with your loan
We know all your facts

What the hell? She is
not satisfied again bro
you need to pump it

I can relate your
Taming of the Snakeputs is
little faith in words

horse came in, some days
it never left from the gate
coup glue coup you dig?

Learn to trust more your
your anti-trust principles
the breakup arrives!

you know you can score
a chick with your looks but can
you satisfy her?

think you're mack daddy?
think again, you ain't hittin'
it with that twinky

He seemed so prescient
so endowed with investment
skills and rough hewn edge

make every inch
of your body perfect now
take every inch

the life of a man
with a big unit is much
much easier now

Indulge your bulge and
the size makes everyone
wonder how'd he grow?

open anyone
the symbolic wedding pledge
is inconstructive


10.10.07

meanwhile, on the streets of Dili...

Pets and trailer trash
Try the nose pick parody
Yeah, Redneck baby!

You need to chill out.
Don't get mad, get Val1um!
Safe secrets with us.

User favorite,
Manage yourself into bliss
Never work again!

A night on the town?
Don't get caught out with a wee
winky! So shameful.

The streets of Dili,
West ham for a fun table,
off the air, and charts.

No tricks, No surprise,
No membership, no gimmicks,
Just 1000 grins.

Really slender gut,
Seize your opportunity,
without sacrifice!

Improve your pickle,
whip it out to dazzle all,
how'd it get so long?

9.10.07

All else was tribute

run to nearest roof
major privatization
dire straits, dire.

You asks yourself this:
is companies in question?
...93%.

Preparation H!
Arabic for "devils on
your magic weapon."

Hey, little dewdrop
Why not be a man with a
capital letter?

Luxuries abound
Skyscrapers tumble in awe
Viagra! Your friend.

Giraffes may laugh but
After the African came
All else was tribute

Imagine the look
on your wife's face when she sees
the new enlarged you

that IS the question...

007
James Bond wears our watch
Omega! You too?

chasing butterflies
overscheduled superman
plopped in passion play

gratuitous? no.
new girth, extent, libido
you ARE Las Vegas.

feel ass, or elbow?
blackfish twits commensalist
feel elbow, or ass?

7.10.07

confidence, dry and secure

Confidence level!
Don't be a tool your whole life
Have big tool instead


Your worm tiny tot?
Turn your snake into python
Women will notice

6.10.07

Zol0ft is the answer!

Want smile again?
Zol0ft is the answer! We
have All that you Need.


We guarantee you
We respect you privacy
Anonymity!

Tuesday's crop is not so long, but definitely nastier.

Benny cavorts and
gets stuck with eighty four crabs
oh what a surprise


Their little hands slip
so they ride on huge thick sticks
oh, Megarotic


Nasty cuties blow
Get inside for showers of
hot action, sister


"Jim jam," my jaw said,
with newfound warmth in his voice.
"Now you understand!"

Fearless International Inc.

you looking for this?
Fearless makes huge waves you be
riding to the bank.


one hot investment
is finally taking off.
All pieces in place

Panama, call home

Prepare for the worst!
You've seen it before, you say?
You ain't seen nothing!


Elastic observe
Sleep and slip, be camera
Pounds peel while you sleep!


Keifer Sutherland
Draughts intoxicate the brain
Stolen fruit is sweet


Sometimes they cook things
(Before you were a model)
That were kind of gross


Consternation sex
Play same sports (except Sumo)
But eat the except


Dilemma sapphire...
Today's nerdy extremist:
Hailed, rolling, strongest!


Monthly recommend
Inspire imaginary blip bleep
Panama, call home


Your money's waiting
Thank you for your loan request...
Click the link, do it.


Overweight psycho,
I was turning into, fast.
I ate all this trash...


Tweak stylesheet page
Go dolphin, footing horses
Arena mirage


Sheet super power
Nationwide dawn of steroids
Butter and danger


The sledgehammered sharks
Can grandson the radio
Art is created


Tangling up with one,
Little purple flower juice,
Stood before the stone throne.


Miracle herb helps
Why not try to be less big?
Oprah Winfrey has


Aren't you so fat now?
Take off your clothes on a beach
...or a bed of lies


Is by chocolate?
Think horses, not of zebras
Light that fuse and neigh


Not live theater
Pottery incited him
Captive hands at work

5.10.07

friday blast

Through the roof today!
Manster is your new weapon
Scramble, get on board


He so shy so he
Adopted a new profile:
Better sex metal!


Are you a minnow?
Do you know that whale dick weighs
One ton? Yours can too.

4.10.07

what's to lose indeed

New casino home!
We're serious about fun.
What's to lose but snooze?


Eventually
Sterility of the MOO
culture of movement.

enough! go to bed.

Rider, galloping,
Receiving remains so hard.
Sit tight, reason, tight.

Catch a sushi ghost
Warming, violent Rockstar
Now, trend producer

Katrina triage
Videogame designer
Fancy codecs fail

we all saw past the looks.

Hollywood trend follower
All the patrons came outside
He saw past the looks

I'll do modeling
Can you tell when guy sounds fake
Background in jazz dance

Hearts, I've broken lots
What a terrible strip club
Pretty much useless

Totally silent
Just true love should take all night!
Cheap drugs, fat no more

3.10.07

that giant sucking sound

chromed attached body
sturdily built qualities
all things have their time


her drag as resin:
disaster, from the moment
outskirts...reappeared


Mr. Long Laster
now whatever your true age
you have the answer


100%
our amazing new product
will prop your proper


scream and cream is what
(in carnival of pink things)
these fresh beauties want


Take that! No, take it!
Leave complaining to others.
Frills and no knickers.


Problems with erect?
Being a veteran you
May have such trouble


nothing ever worked
you tried condoms, alcohol,
pauses, banana...

November 28, 2006 was a good day.

Portable toilets
Flushable wipes save you time
There when you need them

Rufus's eye shut
When dying was easier
Than swamp rose living.

O, meat. O, chaos,
What religion is your bra?
Is oasis? Yes?

Pauperize your life
Our exciting plan shows how
Money flies away

meanwhile at the glue factory

Barbaro, broken
No more Run for the Roses
O Kentucky grief

we've got grooves, and grooves, up on the shelf

Back pressure got you?
So what's Kelly doing now?
All aluminum.


Ball mount giggle drop
"Shouldn't you be in there now?"
Touche! You sex mink.


Maria L. Chicago
Skyscraper tower woman
...one wicked secret


Hard fast hot quick now!
New pillow lateral rods
will have you up nights


Beefed up guys tune in:
Aftermarket intake valve
Will blow you away


Broccoli action,
Cauliflower design. Rat-
catching was their job


Arsenic lover,
If you were born to be shot,
You'll never be hung.


Vatican City,
O, Cialis! Viagra!
Altar boys await.


Supermen workout
in showers and locker rooms
It's good for your blood


Don't let this pass by.
Don't exaggerate small things.
Don't you believe it.


Premature creaming
at Fallacy Pharmacy
Canada's finest

return of the spam haiku

it is time to turn
your baby boy into a
larger sized adult


any bigger and I
would find unacceptable
would be a circus


Yo theodore life
is far too short to be small
step up to the plate